It was kind of a challenging day. A lot stressful. I felt a little crazy from too much to do and not enough time to do it. So I did what any totally normal girl would do…I ate chocolate…on the way to the gym. It was premeditated. I was headed to the gym and on purpose grabbed this giant bag of Belgian Thins chocolate. In my defense it was dark chocolate full of superfoods, that makes it a-ok, right? And it was delicious.
Normally this would have been a recipe for disaster, a binge waiting to happen, a melt down of epic proportions. But it wasn’t. It was just another day, it was just a little chocolate because I felt like it, and it was ok.
Let me repeat that…it was ok.
I know that when I get overwhelmed and stressed out, I eat. I used to eat a LOT. Like half a bag of chips, and some chocolate and cookies and whatever else I “needed” to feel “better”. I would literally eat until I was sick to my stomach. And then I would beat myself up and say awful things to myself. “What a loser, you have no self control, what’s wrong with you, aren’t you fat enough?” Horrible right?
So what’s different now? How can I make it OK to eat chocolate on the way to the gym? How can I trust myself not to binge?
Simple – Instead of being a jerk to myself I observe what’s happening with:
NO JUDGEMENT. NO GUILT. NO SHAME. NO BERATING. NO HIDING. WITH LOVE & KINDNESS.
Is this always easy? Not always. Am I always 100% successful and perfect? Nope. But I decided awhile back that I was sick and tired of judging myself. Sick and tired of feeling guilty every time I ate something that wasn’t on whatever crazy stupid diet I was on that day. So I changed my mindset about eating, dieting, restricting and ME. I changed the way I think about myself. I found food freedom.
Here’s what I’ve learned:
- I can trust myself to eat chocolate (or chips or cookies or whatever)
- I can trust myself to know when to stop and to actually stop (no more sick to my stomach binges)
- I don’t have to hide and feel ashamed because I’m choosing when, what and how much to eat
- I can enjoy ANY food without feeling guilty
- I can still love myself and my body WHILE eating chocolate
And you can too. I promise you.
It takes practice, and patience, and lots and lots of self-love and acceptance. But trust me, its so worth it, you’re so worth it.
But today, just try to be gentle and kind to yourself. Give yourself a break. You are enough just the way you are. Now go enjoy some chocolate!
Your biggest fan and chocoholic